Thoughts from Mark

Can’t sleep any longer….my cheeks are starting to hurt from smiling so much, since I was released :) Last evening, I got to enjoy my release from confinement by going over to Cafe Depot with Paul and Ozzie.

Now that I’m home I’m starting to process what to do with myself now that I’m on the road to recovery. My primary medical issue or current limitation is that of stamina / mobility. I need to take things at a slow pace, and work on building back some strength. My immediate thought is that I will hang out with Jarad..I.e. play in the sandbox, hang out at the park, and gradually move up to stuff like bike rides, and practicing soccer with him. My secondary medical issue is that of sensation in my top teeth and upper lip area where some nerves may have been cut. The sensation is improving on a daily basis, but if you’re passing by I am currently looking for popsicles. I had a hard time eating an apple on Wednesday, as chewing without the sensation of your teeth is challenging. I’ve also started a “to do” list of things to occupy me, as I recover, but would continue to appreciate people passing by just to talk.

Some random thoughts:

11934 minutes. I was hospitalized for 11934 minutes. The staff at Charles Lemone Hospital gave me fantastic service, were extremely attentive, and compassionate for about 11930 of those minutes. In time, I will forget the 4 minutes of terror I felt, after a shift change, and an inexperienced and distracted orderly started pulling on a handful of IV lines along with the sheets, and then making reckless adjustments to height of my bed without reading the sign indicating, the dangers of doing so.

Tuesday morning (day 7) . As you may know on Friday (day 3), the surgeon had advised me that on the Monday (day 6) she would come back to see me to remove the tube that have been draining fluid from the base of my spine, and had required me to lay flat on my back (on the tube) When she did not show up on the Monday, and had not left a status update with the nurses or other doctors, I was very disappointed, and woke up on Tuesday very discouraged. I was in a bad mood.. I knew I was in a bad mood, and I had a weird sort of contentment about it. It was as if I was rationalizing that although the doctor had the ability (control) to determine when I would be given back mobility, that she couldn’t control my mood, and if I wanted to be happy or mad, that this was something within my control, and it couldn’t me taken away from me, so I would be mad as long as I wanted. As day 7 progressed, and I eventually gave up my desire to mad, and wanted to get over being sorry for myself. I realized that I was not in control, and needed God’s help. I prayed for strength and with God’s help my joy came back. It was a bit of a battle though, and several times throughout the day I needed to go back to prayer, as negative thoughts would role in and I needed help rolling them out. Before the surgeon arrived on Tuesday evening to remove the tube, and grant permission to get out of bed my anger was gone. After the tube was out, I felt like dancing (figuratively) . For those interested, the reason she had not come on Monday, was she wanted to keep the tube in an extra day, and the reason she had not come sooner on Tuesday was that she needed to save a couple lives, and performed back to back brain surgeries. Although I’m not one to hold a grudge, I think most people would accept the later excuse…i.e. prioritize save 2 lives versus relieve a minor discomfort.

Thanks Sherri, Mom, Dad, Ariel, Morgan, Jarad, Diane, Neil, Karen, Randy, Marie-Claude, Marc, Felicia, Roger, Paul, Zack, Alec, Tim, Brian, Kevin, Mercedes, Bob, Monica, Sean, Michelle, Richard, Rose, Jean Pierre for coming to visit me, and bring me news from the outside world. I very much enjoyed our talks, and your encouragement. As well thanks Linda, Danny, Cristina and others for calling or taking my calls when I needed to talk. From the same token, I equally appreciated those that offered to come see me, but followed my request to not come, as I needed rest. I could fill pages of thanks for the people that assisted (and continue to assist) thought prayer, emails of encouragement and direct support to Sherri on the home front.


Humour 1…as the operating room was like a freezer, my exposed toes started to turn white as I have a unrelated mild case Raynaud’s disease …before covering my feet up the anesthesiologist said “Look here pal, I don’t want you messing up my reputation, and having people start saying..Did you hear about the guy that went in for brain surgery and lost a toe?” We laughed and then he warmed up my feet.

Humour 2…when the neuro surgeon came to see me on the 3rd day to remove the packing from my nose she couldn’t work the up/down controls on the bed, to get me in the position she needed, and she called someone to push the button for her to which I commented…well it’s not like it’s brain surgery :) The joke may have been lost in translation, as she didn’t laugh.

Humour 3…On Tuesday when I was feeling down, and I had let the patient next to me know how I was feeling, she thought maybe a piece of fruit she had brought from home would cheer me up, and when a nurse had come in, she had asked him to pass it to me. Unfortunately what she didn’t know is that for last 7 days, I was on a liquid, and Jell-O-only diet, and putting food in front of me that I was not allowed to eat, didn’t really help. We did get a chuckle out of the attempt to make me feel better though.

As you can see I’ve been away from a computer for a while, and had a lot to get off my mind, now that the tumour is removed.

Thanks for your time
Mark

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